Ezweni lanamuhla elisheshayo, abazali abaningi bazizwa becindezelekile ukuhlinzeka izingane zabo ngamathuba amahle kakhulu, bejwayele ukuzifaka emisebenzini eminingi, bephusha ukuze zifeze izinto ezinhle kwezemfundo, futhi behlela yonke imizuzu yosuku lwazo. Nakuba inhloso yabo mihle, leli jubane elingapheli lingaholela ku-Hurried Child Syndrome, igama elaqanjwa nguDkt. David Elkind, elichaza ukucindezeleka nokukhathazeka izingane ezikuzwayo lapho ziphoqwa ukuba zikhule ngokushesha okukhulu noma zithwale imithwalo eminingi kakhulu.
Ukuqonda i-Hurried Child Syndrome nokufunda indlela yokunciphisa ijubane lomndeni wakho kungadala indawo enempilo nejabulisayo yokuba ingane yakho ikhule, ihlole, futhi ichume.
Kuyini i-Hurried Child Syndrome?
I-Hurried Child Syndrome yenzeka lapho izingane kulindeleke ukuba zenze ngamazinga adlula amandla azo okukhula, ngokuvamile ngenxa yokuhlela okungaphezu kwamandla, izinto ezilindeleke kakhulu, noma ukuchayeka ekucindezelekeni okufana nokwabantu abadala kusenesikhathi. Lesi simo singathonya izingane ngokomzwelo, ngokwenhlalo, nangokomzimba, okungase kuholele ekukhathaleni, ukukhathazeka, noma ukulahlekelwa intshisekelo emisebenzini ezaziyijabulela ngaphambili.
Izimpawu ze-Hurried Child Syndrome
- Ukucindezeleka noma ukukhathazeka okuvamile mayelana nesikole, imisebenzi eyengeziwe, noma imithwalo yemfanelo.
- Ukulahlekelwa intshisekelo ekudlaleni noma emisebenzini yokudala, engahleliwe.
- Izikhalazo mayelana nezimpawu zomzimba ezifana nekhanda elibuhlungu, izinhlungu zesisu, noma ukukhathala.
- Ukwanda kokucasuka, ukushintshashintsha kwemizwelo, noma ukuphuma kwemizwelo.
- Ubunzima bokulala noma ukukhathala okungapheli.
- Ukungabaza ukuzibandakanya emisebenzini eyayithandwa ngaphambili.
- Ukugxila okuqhubekayo ekusebenzeni, njengamamaki noma impumelelo, kunokwaneliseka komuntu siqu.
Kungani Kwenzeka?
- Ukucindezeleka Ukuze Uphumelele: Abazali bangase bazizwe benengcindezi emphakathini ukuqinisekisa ukuthi ingane yabo iphumelela kwezemfundo, kwezemidlalo, noma kwezenhlalo.
- Ukuhlela Okungaphezu Kwamandla: Ukufaka izingane emisebenzini eminingi ehleliwe kushiye isikhathi esincane sokuphumula noma sokudlala mahhala.
- Izinto Ezilindeleke Kakhulu: Ukuphoqa izingane ukuba zifeze izinto ezinkulu noma zenze ezingeni elidlula iminyaka yazo.
- Ukuchayeka Ezinkingeni Zabantu Abadala: Ukubandakanya izingane ezingxoxweni noma ekucindezelekeni mayelana nezimali, ubudlelwane, noma izenzakalo zomhlaba ezingakakulungeli ukuzisingatha ngokomzwelo.
Kungani i-Hurried Child Syndrome Iyingozi
Izingane zikhula kahle ezindaweni ezibavumela ukuba bakhule ngejubane labo. Lapho ziphoqwa noma zithwaliswa imithwalo yemfanelo eyeqile, zingase zizwe:
- Izinkinga Zempilo Yengqondo: Amazinga anyukile okukhathazeka, ukucindezeleka, noma ukuzethemba okuphansi.
- Ukukhathala: Ukulahlekelwa isisusa noma intshisekelo emisebenzini ngenxa yokuchayeka kakhulu.
- Ukubambezeleka Ekukhuleni: Isikhathi esinganele sokudlala mahhala singaphazamisa ukukhula ngokomzwelo, ngokwenhlalo, nangokwengqondo.
- Ubudlelwane Bomndeni Obunengcindezi: Ukuba matasa njalo kunganciphisa amathuba okuxhumana nokwakha ubudlelwane.
Indlela Yokunciphisa Ijubane Lomndeni Wakho
Ukwakha indlela yokuphila elinganiselayo ebeka phambili ukuphumula, ukuxhumana, nokuhlola kungasiza ukuvimbela noma ukudambisa i-Hurried Child Syndrome. Nazi izinyathelo ongazithatha ukuze wehlise ijubane futhi ukhuthaze indawo yomndeni enempilo.
1. Phinde Uhlole Isheduli Yakho
Bheka ngokwethembeka ikhalenda lomndeni wakho. Ingabe ziningi kakhulu izibopho ezishiya isikhathi esincane sokuphumula?
- Nciphisa inani lemisebenzi eyengeziwe ingane yakho ezibandakanya kuyo. Umthetho omuhle okufanele uwukhumbule ukubeka phambili ikhwalithi kunenani.
- Yakha “isikhathi samahhala” esivamile nsuku zonke lapho ingane yakho ingaphumula, idlale, noma izibandakanye emisebenzini ekhethayo.
2. Vumela Ukudlala Okungahleliwe
Ukudlala okungahleliwe kubalulekile ekukhuleni kwengane, kukhuthaza ubuciko, ukuxazulula izinkinga, nokuzimela.
- Khuthaza ingane yakho ukuba idlale ngaphandle kohlelo oluqondile, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi yakha ngamabhulokhi, idlala ngaphandle, noma idala izimo ezingacabangi.
- Melana nesilingo sokuqondisa ukudlala kwayo; yiyeke ihlole ngejubane layo.
3. Beka Izinto Ezilindeleke Ezingokoqobo
Lungisa izinto ozilindele ngokuya ngeminyaka yengane yakho nesigaba sayo sokukhula.
- Gwema ukuqhathanisa ingane yakho nabanye noma ukuyiphoqa ukuba ifinyelele izinto ezinkulu ngokushesha kunontanga bayo.
- Gubha umzamo nokukhula kunokuphelela noma imiphumela.
4. Beka Phambili Isikhathi Somndeni
Ukuchitha isikhathi ndawonye njengomndeni kuqinisa ubudlelwane futhi kudale umuzwa wokuphepha engane yakho.
- Bekela eceleni isikhathi sokudla njalo nomndeni, imidlalo yobusuku, noma ukuphuma ngempelasonto.
- Nciphisa iziphazamiso, ezifana namafoni noma umsebenzi, ngesikhathi somndeni ukuze ugxile ekuxhumaneni.
5. Fundisa Inani Lokuphumula
Siza ingane yakho iqonde ukuthi ukuphumula kubaluleke njengomsebenzi.
- Setha imikhuba yokulala engaguquki ukuze uqinisekise ukuthi ithola ukulala okwanele.
- Bonisa ukuziphatha okunempilo ngokuthatha ikhefu futhi ungacwilisi kakhulu isheduli yakho.
6. Khuthaza Ukubonakaliswa Kwemizwa
Khuthaza ingane yakho ukuba iveze imizwa yayo futhi uqinisekise imizwa yayo.
- Dala indawo ephephile yezingxoxo ezivulekile mayelana nokucindezeleka noma ukungabi namandla.
- Fundisa amasu okubhekana nezinkinga njengokuphefumula okujulile, ukuzindla, noma ukubhala idayari ukuze ubasesize balawule ukucindezeleka.
7. Vikela Ubuntwana Babo
Vumela izingane zibe izingane ngokuzivumela ukuba zizwe ukumangala, ukuhlola, nokwazi ngaphandle kwengcindezi yemithwalo efana neyabantu abadala.
- Gwema ukuxoxa ngezinkinga zabantu abadala, njengezinkinga zezimali noma ukucindezeleka emsebenzini, phambi kwengane yakho.
- Gxila ekudaleni indawo ejabulisayo, ekhulisa enziwa ukuba bazizwe bengenakukhathazeka.
8. Beka Imingcele Kubuchwepheshe
Ukuchayeka njalo ezikrinini nasezinkundleni zokuxhumana kungangeza ingcindezi engadingekile yokusebenza noma yokulandela ontanga.
- Setha imingcele yesikhathi sesikrini, ikakhulukazi ngaphambi kokulala.
- Khuthaza ukuxhumana ubuso nobuso nemisebenzi engabandakanyi ubuchwepheshe.
9. Hola Ngokwesibonelo
Izingane zivame ukulingisa ukuziphatha kwabazali bazo. Zibonise indlela yokuphila impilo elinganiselayo, enokuqonda.
- Gwema ukuzinikela kakhulu emisebenzini noma ezibophweni zenhlalo.
- Yabelana ngezikhathi zokuthula, njengokufunda incwadi, ukuzindla, noma ukujabulela ukuhamba ndawonye.
10. Gxila Ekujabuleni Nokwazi
Shintsha ukugxila kusuka empumelelweni kuye ekujabuleni. Khuthaza ingane yakho ukuba ihlole imisebenzi ngenxa yenjabulo, hhayi ukusebenza.
- Yiyeke ikhethe imisebenzi eyithanda ngempela, kunokuba leyo ebukeka kahle ku-resume.
- Yincoma ubuciko bayo, ukwazi, nomzamo, hhayi kuphela impumelelo yayo.
Isiphetho
I-Hurried Child Syndrome iyisibonakaliso sezidingo ezisheshayo zokuphila kwesimanje, kodwa inselele engabhekelwa ngezinguquko ezinhleliwe. Ngokunciphisa ijubane, ukuvumela isikhathi esingahleliwe, nokukhuthaza ibhalansi enempilo phakathi komsebenzi nokuphumula, ungasiza ingane yakho ikhule endaweni ekhulisayo lapho izizwa iphephile, isekelwe, futhi ihlonishwa. Ukuvikela ubuntwana bayo akukhona ukuyibamba—kumayelana nokuyiyeka ikhule ngejubane layo kuyilapho kukhuthazwa ukuqina, ubuciko, nenjabulo.
Imibuzo Evamile
1. Ngingakwazi kanjani ukusho ukuthi ingane yami ihlangabezana ne-Hurried Child Syndrome?
Izimpawu zihlanganisa ukucindezeleka okuvamile, ukukhathala, ukucasuka, noma ukulahlekelwa intshisekelo emisebenzini eyayithandwa ngaphambili. Kungase futhi ibe nezimpawu zomzimba ezifana nekhanda elibuhlungu noma ubunzima bokulala.
2. Kubi yini ukufaka ingane yami emisebenzini eminingi?
Akunjalo ngempela. Ibhalansi ibalulekile. Khetha imisebenzi embalwa ingane yakho eyithanda ngempela futhi uqinisekise ukuthi isenaso isikhathi esiningi sokuphumula.
3. Ingabe i-Hurried Child Syndrome ingaba nemiphumela yesikhathi eside?
Ukucindezeleka okungapheli nengcindezi ebuntwaneni kungaholela ezinkingeni ezifana nokukhathazeka, ukukhathala, nokuzethemba okuphansi. Ukunciphisa ijubane kungasiza ukuvimbela le miphumela.
4. Ingakanani isikhathi samahhala ingane yami okufanele isibe naso nsuku zonke?
Yonke ingane ihlukile, kodwa iningi lizuza okungenani ihora lokudlala okungahleliwe nsuku zonke, ngaphezu kokuphumula okwanele nesikhathi somndeni.
5. Ngingayilinganisa kanjani isheduli yengane yami nempilo yami ematasa?
Beka phambili isikhathi sekhwalithi kunenani. Yenza lula isheduli yomndeni wakho ngokukhipha izibopho ezingadingekile futhi ugxile ekudaleni izikhathi ezinencazelo ndawonye.
