Uma ungumzali wengane enezidingo ezikhethekile, zonke izici zokuba umzali ziyakhuliswa. Izinsuku zokudlala ziba amaphrojekthi ayinkimbinkimbi adinga idiplomacy, ukwesekwa, kanye nenani elikhulu lesikhathi nokubekezela. Uhambo oluya kudokotela luvamile, luyabiza, lunzima, futhi lugcwele ukukhathazeka. Uhambo oluvamile lokuthenga lugcwele izinhlekelele ezingaba nezingibe. Ngokunye okuningi ongacabanga ngakho, ukukhathazeka ngakho, ukuhlelela, nokuphatha, izidingo ezikhethekile abazali banazo ngempela... izidingo ezikhethekile.
Izinto Ezingu-11 Izidingo Ezikhethekile Ezidingwa Abazali
Nalu uhlu oluyingxenye olungase luzwakale lujwayelekile komama nobaba ababhekana nezimo ezinzima zokuphila nengane okuthi, nganoma yisiphi isizathu, ibhekwa "njengekhethekile." Nakuba laba beyi-11 ephezulu, abalandelani ngendlela ethile.
Isikhathi esengeziwe
Phakathi kwemihlangano ye-PTO neminqamulajuqu yomsebenzi, kungaba nzima kunoma yimuphi umzali ukuthola isikhathi "sami". Khulisa izikhathi ezingu-10 kubazali bezingane ezinezidingo ezikhethekile okufanele futhi bengeze imihlangano ye-IEP, izikhathi zokwelashwa, nokuvakasha kodokotela abaningi kule ngxube.
Engeza izinselele ezifana nokushayela amamayela angu-50 ukuze ufike kudokotela wamazinyo okuwukuphela kwakhe ozosebenza nengane yakho, bese ufunda ukuthi uzodinga ukubuya ngesonto elizayo ukuze ugcwalise leso sikhala... bese ushayela amamayela angu-60 uya kwelinye icala ngoba ingane yakho ifuna ukudlala i-ballet futhi kunekilasi le-ballet elidinga izidingo ezikhethekile ngakolunye uhlangothi lwesifunda. Futhi masingaqali ngesikhathi sakho, umlingani wakho, ezinye izingane zakho, umndeni wakho owandisiwe.
Amachibi Amandla Amakhulu
Akukhona nje kuphela ukuthi akudli isikhathi ukuba umzali onezidingo ezikhethekile, kodwa futhi kuyakhathaza. Hlanganisa wonke amandla adingekayo ukuze ukhulise ingane evamile, bese wengeza amahora ngosuku okushayela ukuya ezindaweni ezimisiwe zedolobha, ukugcwalisa amaphepha, ukwenza ucwaningo olwengeziwe, ukulawula ukuqubuka kwengane yakho, ukupheka ukudla okukhethekile kwengane yakho ngenxa yokungezwani komzimba nezinto ezithile, ukungabekezelelani. , noma izinkinga zokudla.
Sebenzisa amandla adingekayo ukuze ubhekane nokugqolozela abantu ongabazi, "ukukhathazeka" kothisha, nokukhathazeka kogogo nomkhulu, futhi konke kuhlanganisa amahora ambalwa kakhulu phakathi kwamashidi.
Imali Yezokwelapha Ezibaluleke Kakhulu nokunye
Abazali ababili abasebenza isikhathi esigcwele kufanele, ezimweni eziningi, bakwazi ukuthola imali eyanele ukuze umkhaya uphile ngokunethezeka. Kodwa uma ungumzali wengane enezidingo ezikhethekile izindleko ziyakhuphuka.
Imishini ekhethekile, imithi, abelaphi, igesi eyengeziwe yokushayela kubo bonke labo chwepheshe—konke kuyahlanganisa. Futhi omama abaningi bezingane ezinezidingo ezikhethekile bagcina benciphisa amahora abo okusebenza ukuze batholakalele izingane zabo, ngaleyo ndlela behlise iholo labo lapho belidinga kakhulu.
Ubungane Okuvamile
Uma ungumzali wengane enezidingo ezikhethekile, kubonakala sengathi konke ukusebenzelana ngaphandle komsebenzi kuhilela isici esithile sezidingo ezikhethekile zokukhulisa izingane. Ngisho nemibuthano yakho yokuxhumana iphetha kuhlanganise ikakhulukazi abazali bezinye izingane ezinezidingo ezikhethekile, nezingxoxo ezigxile "kumelaphi ongcono kakhulu we-x" noma "ukuthi ubole kangakanani uthisha wegumbi lezinsiza."
Kodwa njengawo wonke umuntu, abazali bezingane ezinezidingo ezikhethekile balangazelela ukuthintana nabantu okuvamile. Ubhiya nabangani. Umdlalo we-baseball. Isikhathi sokubuyela emuva nabangani nomndeni ngaphandle kokubhekisela egameni elithi "okukhethekile."
I-Sitter for Date Night
Abazali bezingane ezivamile baqasha umzanyana futhi baphume kusihlwa. Kubazali abanezidingo ezikhethekile zezingane, akulula ngaso sonke isikhathi.
Ezinye izidingo ezikhethekile zidinga abahleli abanamakhono akhethekile angasukela ekuqeqeshweni kwezokwelapha kuye kochwepheshe be-autism. Akukhona nje kuphela ukuthi abazanyana abanjalo kunzima ukubathola, kodwa (ngokwemvelo) bakhokhisa isilinganiso esiphindwe kabili noma kathathu.
Isiqinisekiso Sokuthi Wenza Izinto Ezilungile
Uma ingane yakho inezidingo ezikhethekile, kungenzeka ukuthi uchithe isikhathi esingenangqondo ukhathazekile ngokuthi ngabe ubangele izinkinga zakhe ngandlela-thile, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ukhethe izinketho ezifanele zezokwelapha noma zokwelapha, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi wenza ngokwanele (noma kakhulu) ukuthuthukisa amathuba akhe empilweni.
Nakuba kungekho muntu ongakutshela ukuthi ikusasa liyolethani, abazali abaningi abanezidingo ezikhethekile badinga indlebe elalelayo nokusabela okuhle lapho benovalo ngokukhetha kwabo siqu nalokho okuyolethwa ikusasa.
Le yindawo ka Vent
Umlingani wakho usekuzwe izikhathi ezingama-50. Abazali bakho bazwile noma abanandaba. Abangani bakho abanantshisekelo yokuzwa ngomhlangano wakho wakamuva okhungathekisayo we-IEP, futhi ababona osebenza nabo. Awukwazi ukuveza izingane zakho. Manje ubani osele? Ngokubambelela kukho, abazali abanezidingo ezikhethekile zezingane bangase benze izinto zibe zimbi nakakhulu, kodwa yiziphi izinketho zabo?
Amaqembu okusekela angaba usizo, kodwa ukuze ufike kuwo udinga ukuthola iqembu elifanele, ucacise isikhathi ekhalendeni lakho, ukushayela uye emhlanganweni futhi uthemba ukuthi amalungu azoba nesikhathi namandla okuphendula okukukhathazayo.
Ukuzivocavoca Nokudla Okunempilo
Lokhu kungase kuzwakale njengendaba encane, kodwa kubazali abaningi abanezidingo ezikhethekile zezingane, awekho nje amahora anele ngosuku okuzinakekela. Ukuzivocavoca, kubantu abaningi, kukhulula ukucindezeleka okukhulu. Kungaba futhi ithuba lokuhlangana nabangani.
Okubaluleke nakakhulu, ukungawuvivinyi umzimba kungaholela ezinkingeni ezinkulu zempilo. Okufanayo, kunjalo, ngokudla okunomsoco: ukudla okuvamile kakhulu kungalimaza ukugaya kwakho, isisindo, nempilo yakho.
Umndeni nabangane abanomkhondo
Kuyamangaza ukuthi kaningi kangakanani ngisho nomndeni nabangane abanezisusa ezinhle bekhathazeka futhi babe nenhliziyo encane lapho bechayeka enganeni enezidingo ezikhethekile ezithambile. Ingane ene-autistic ayifuni ukudlala ibhola elithintathinta, noma ingane enezinselele zezinzwa ibeka izandla zayo ezindlebeni zayo, futhi wonke umuntu osegumbini ubonakala ephendula ngokumangala okumangazayo.
Nakuba ingane ngokwayo ingase ingaqapheli amashiya aphakanyisiwe kanye nokubukana, abazali ngokuqinisekile bayaqaphela. Futhi nakuba kunzima ukubhekana nezahlulelo ezivela kubantu ongabazi, kunzima kakhulu ukuvumela izahlulelo zabangane abaseduze zikususe emhlane wakho.
Ulwazi Olubalulekile Ochwepheshe Abahluleka Ukwabelana Ngalo
Izikole, odokotela, abelapha, nama-ejensi konke kumiswe ukuze kusizwe imindeni isekele izingane zayo ezinezidingo ezikhethekile. Kungani-ke kungekho neyodwa yalezi zinhlangano ebonakala izimisele ngempela ukutshela imindeni ukuthi yini etholakalayo, yini enegunya lokuyithola, nokuthi ingakuthola kanjani lokho ekudingayo?
Abazali abaningi abanezidingo ezikhethekile zezingane bazokutshela ukuthi usuvele udinga ukwazi umthetho wezidingo ezikhethekile, uqonde ukungena nokuphuma kwezinketho nezinqubomgomo ze-ejensi, futhi ube nokuqonda okuphelele kwazo zonke izindlela zokwelapha ezitholakalayo ngaphambi kokunyathela unyawo emhlanganweni wokuhlelela ingane yabo.
Ngokuvamile, abazali bazi ngaphezu kwalabo okuthiwa ochwepheshe lapho bengena emnyango, okusho ukuthi uMama noBaba banokulingana neminyaka eminingana yokuqeqeshwa eyunivesithi ngenxa yokuhlwa ebusuku phambi kwekhompyutha.
Umqeqeshi Wokukusiza Ukumela Nokuqondisa Isifundo Sakho
Akekho kithi ophila ngaphezu kokukodwa, ngakho-ke sonke siyizimfundamakhwela uma kuziwa endabeni yokukhulisa izingane. Kodwa kunabantu abenza umsebenzi wokusiza abazali bezingane ezinezidingo ezikhethekile ukuze bazule ongakhetha kuzo kanye nezingibe.
Abazali abaningi bangajabula ukuthola usizo lomqeqeshi onjalo ongabatshela ukuthi "cela lokhu, hhayi lokhuya," noma "ugcwalise leli fomu futhi uzokwazi ukufinyelela ezinsizeni ezingcono zengane yakho."
Ungamsiza Kanjani Umzali Wengane Onezidingo Ezikhethekile
Uma ungumngane, ingane yakini, umama, noma ubaba womzali wengane enezidingo ezikhethekile ungase uzibuze ukuthi "Ngingenzani ukuze ngisize?" Izindaba ezinhle ukuthi ziningi izindlela ongenza ngazo umehluko ngaphandle kokushintsha impilo yakho noma ukuzithwalisa kanzima wena nomndeni wakho. Nazi ezinye iziphakamiso:
- Zinikele ngokugadwa ingane. Uma kungaphakathi kwendawo yakho yokunethezeka nekhono, nikeza abangani bakho ikhefu ngokunakekela ingane yabo enezidingo ezikhethekile ihora, kusihlwa, noma ngisho nangempelasonto. Lokhu kubizwa ngokuthi ukunakekelwa kokuphefumula, futhi kuyisipho esingavamile.
- Thatha ithebhu. Ukubolekwa imali cishe kuwumbono omubi ngezizathu eziningi, kodwa uma ukwazi kuba kuhle ukuthatha ithebhu ukuze uthole isidlo sasemini, ubhiya, noma ngisho nesidlo sakusihlwa.
- Nikeza izingane zakini ubumnandi obukhethekile. Abantu abaningi abanezidingo ezikhethekile zezingane ngokuvamile bakhulisa izingane ezidinga ukunakwa. Uma ukwazi, cabanga ukuthatha izingane zakini zengane enezidingo ezikhethekile uyozitholela okuthile, noma uzishayele uye emicimbini yazo yezemidlalo futhi uzijabulele. Kuyindlela enhle yokwakha ubuhlobo kuyilapho unikeza umama nobaba isikhathi esincane sokuba bodwa.
- Thola umkhondo. Ungabi yilowo dade, umzala, noma umzali ogqolozele ingane enezidingo ezikhethekile angazi ukuthi uzozibandakanya kanjani nayo. Kunalokho, funda incwadi, buka ividiyo, vakashela ikilasi, noma ubuze imibuzo ukuze ukwazi ukungena phakathi nemicimbi yomndeni.
- Lalela . Ngeke kukubize i-nickel ukuba indlebe elalelayo nehlombe ukukhala kulo.
- Hamba ngezinyawo . Nikeza umzali wengane enezidingo ezikhethekile ithuba lokuphumela ngaphandle eshaywe umoya futhi azivocavoce kancane nomngane noma othandekayo.
- Yiba osekelayo futhi ube nombono omuhle. Kulula kakhulu ukungena enkulumweni engemihle lapho uxoxa ngengane enezidingo ezikhethekile. Esikhundleni sokujikela phansi, noma kunjalo, yenza konke okusemandleni akho ukugcizelela okuhle. Tshela umngane wakho noma othandekayo ukuthi benza umsebenzi omuhle kakhulu, futhi ukhombe eminye yemiphumela emihle ngempela acishe ayibona.
- Gwema isihawu. Nakuba ngezinye izikhathi kunzima ukucabanga izinselele zezidingo ezikhethekile zokukhulisa izingane, isihawu asisizi. Eqinisweni, isihawu singaqinisa ukukhungatheka nemizwa yokuhlukaniswa. Kugweme.
- Beka isibonelo sokufakwa. Bonisa abanye ukuthi ukufakwa kwenziwa kanjani ngokuthola izindlela zokuhlanganisa ingane edinga izidingo ezikhethekile zomngane wakho kokujwayelekile imisebenzi. Uma udinga, vumela izinselele. Isibonelo, uma ingane enezidingo ezikhethekile kunzima ukukhuphukela phezulu kwesilayidi, mnike isandla. Uma engakwazi ukupompa umjiko, mphushe. Uma engayiqondi kahle imithetho yomdlalo, yenza umdlalo ube lula. Akunzima njengoba kubukeka!
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